I have battled uncertainty all my life. I don’t know if it is pride or just being afraid of my own feelings. I am constantly trying to be in control . This just brings emptiness. In the heart of my darkness the emptiness was terrifying. I felt an almost constant ache deep in the pit of my stomach. The more vices I gave into, the more pain I felt. Everything around me crumbled. Trying to be in control of others or situations just left me lonely. I used to believe being lonely was a part of my genetic make-up. I could never shake it. I know now God doesn’t want us to be lonely. He has filled parts of me that were incomplete and has given me the pleasure of overcoming many painful obstacles. I still struggle everyday. Thankfully, God is the only one I answer to. All my wrong decisions, being too late or too early or not good enough does not apply with him. If i am in his will everything will be perfect!