Lupus Rant

The Lupus 3 dark cloud and associated hot youn...

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Have I told you today that I hate Lupus? I hate waking up, walking out of my bedroom and hearing….Nothing. Everyone has already started their day. I look around the house and all I see is a mess. Someone forgot their Friday folder, Someone left the milk out, and cloths are everywhere because of course nobody folded the cloths in the dryer so they were missing all their essentials. Sometimes it feels like everything is crumbling around me. Did I tell you I was a perfectionist? I might have forgotten to mention that. I guess that is getting better because before if I saw my husbands cloths lying in front of the hamper I would lose it. I am not sure why the boys in this house cannot actually dump the cloths in the container instead of right in front of it? Anyway, I am sad. I cannot stay awake more than a few hours at a time. And, now I am boring. I am not a fun mom anymore. My family tells me they love me. I know they do and don’t see things the way I do but I don’t want my life to be like this. Can anyone make it go away? Sorry everyone, I just need to vent. Lupus will not win! It may today, but not forever.

12 thoughts on “Lupus Rant

  1. Hang in there, Jenn-Jenn! Although I have no idea 😦 exactly what you are going through with the Lupus, I can relate to the emptiness, sadness, suffering, and just plain misery through the 20 months I was pregnant and debiliated with the severe hyperemesis. No one completely understands, and my condition was temporary. Long-lasting, but temporary. I know this is not the case for you (until they find a cure!), but I can understand some of your feelings and am here for you if you ever just need to vent or yell and scream that it’s not fair, ‘cuz it’s not! I love you and hope you can find some relief soon….both physical and emotional. You deserve it! Love ya and please give all the boys my love! ~Lori

  2. So sorry you are having to go through so much with the Lupus…you are a very strong person, though, and if anyone can do it you can! I get angry too when I face all the aggravations associated with arthritis, but I know God knows that I can do it and hopefully inspire someone else along the way. I love you!!

  3. SO wish I could make it go away…so sorry 😦 But tomorrow is a new day, stay strong & please know I’m here if you ever need anything. Much love always & forever.

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