Whisper to Jesus for Comfort and Strength and Bedhlam Will Show Your Spirit


jpg-creativity-is-so-delicate-a-flower-that-praise-tends-to-make-it-bloom-while-discouragement-often-nips-it-in-the-bud-samuel-bJames 3:5 says, “The tongue is a small thing but what enormous damage it can do.”Children live in deep un conscious unity with their parents.  They may be able to feel a parent’s emotions and moods before they are expressed. When a parent develops setbacks, these can cause great discouragement to the child. disasters and obstacles can control the leadership of the family eventually sowing a seed in the child’s behaviour.  Beliefs produce that behavior. This initiates us to believe the things that are not true. This control produces sinful behavior and every act of sin in our lives begins with a lie.

Children have the biggest hearts. They do not use lies as opportunities. Their devotion and tender prayers are so simple and free from judgement.  Why can’t we love like that?

God’s  compassion changes everyday.  It becomes new and fresh.  But what if God turned the tables and offered us no compassion?  When we asked for forgiveness what if he said no?  When we asked for a helping hand, and he said he did not have time.?. Many people are unaware that this behavior consumes their heart.  Many days I am an empty shell in need of a loving hand to feel around me.  I feel if I make one more mistake I could easily stay this way. I am truly powerless but how do you become powerful when its hard to think straight?rf_detail_227_0

We can never know exactly what we will face each day .  But we need to dressed for the fight.  Before rising, let prayer be your protection. In these times we all need a saving grace who can provide comfort,hope and strength.

Mr. Clean-I Need Help With Some Tough Love


A metallic chain with an explosed link.“Don’t just pretend to love others.  Really love them.  Hate what is wrong”(Romans 12:9).  Why is it so hard to love some people?  My mother-in-law, the one who gives me a pounding headache.  The one who has the un official authority to say and do anything was ringing the doorbell at my own humble house.  I could hear her come in and I smelled the spring air fly through the house like a wave of sweetness.  I heard her uneven steps as she navigated over the things on the floor.  As I began to apologize for the jeans hanging on the back of the chairs and the shoes scattered around, I forgot about the dishes in the sink.  I quickly tried to make it to the sink without her realizing what I was about to do.  Her laughter filled the house as the hot water bubbled up and over  the soap-filled dish pan.  She put her arm around me and reminded me her house was not always perfect.  It certainly did not make her a failure as a mother. And she said,” I don’t think that of you.”  There is an admiration that comes after we have tried to do another persons job.

When I was a child everything I did had to be perfect.  The anxiety that led up to an event was gut wrenching.  I did not want ny father to make fun of me or talk down to me.  It was my sport and I was sure I knew what I was doing.  But I was so used to it.  Did he ever tell me good job?  I can’t remember.  I am sure at times he did.  Even now I am the last one out of four girls that he calls if something happens…good or bad.  is he embarrassed of me.  Does he not trust me?  After my introduction to my wild side that REALLY changed things. He did not trust my professional opinion or ask for advise on anything.  I always got a lecture on why I needed help or money.  There was always a fight. He always had to tell me what I was doing wrong. Not in a good learning experience, but  a bad hurtful one.  I loved him but now I don’t want to be around him.  I needed him.  Not to fight, not for him to dominate the conversation but to teach me, to love me. Was I a disappointment?  Is that why I am not good at much?  Am I teaching my kids that?   Am I raising my kids wrong.  That is the opinion I get from him.. Why does he hate me so much?  How do i break the cycle.  Is this why I feel so guilty after I know that I have done some thing wrong? It is  like I can never get it back.  It will never disappear and it leaves me with a big gushing hole in my heart. Is this why I can’t forgive?  It is a horrible feeling to feel as though you are not good at the things a parent expects you to be.  love-god-and-your-neighbor_21162404

As I go through my seasons I have to remember that God commanded us to love our enemies .  I pray that he will teach me how to love difficult people.

Despite the Hardened Exterior My Soul is Still Pliable


friendship-32vWhy is depression so hard? It arrises when the truth is not real. It is when you are alone with yourself and you do not like who you are. It is when the weight of the world tumults down on you and the innermost fragments of your head is so broken you do not know how to fix it. All of your emotions are blurred in a big bubble and everything you feel gets stuck together. You cannot differentiate between happiness and sadness. It is a massive sentiment that lingers until one by one the bubbles burst and a revelation unfolds to reveal whatever emotion stands strong that day.

These monsters.  Do you mock in that delight? One more day you have my mind and my heart. To live where every step becomes so much to bear. But God keeps me here. There must be a reason I am so weak?  I have no one who could understand and I am not strong enough to do this by myself. So, I sit here and I hope God is listening.

You know what feels the worst is knowing that you have screwed up your life. I will never have any opportunities to excel at the gifts I was given. I ruined them.. there is no way to get them back.. I want to be a good person but as a mother there is always something to do, fix or make.
But then all of that changed.  I began to yell at the boys for fighting over the XBox because someone was in someone elses room.  I threw up my hands in disgust.  I sat on the couch and put my face in my hands.  The boys quickly came in and in their most serious voice asked me why I was so sad.  I don’t know I said I guess I just need extra special love from you now. They brought me a pillow, propped up my feet, brought me my water and with a big hug told me thank you for doing this for us every night.  002

Nobody knows the struggle I am going through. But It can never be too late to excel at the gifts God has given you. Will it help to talk about my past? Will it help to talk about all the wrong in my life? I like to see stories of recovery don’t get me wrong but I hate to hear condescending people who think they could never go back to being a user. Watch yourself because you will fall again. A changed life gets a person’s attention every time. (Liz Curtis Higgins)

Simple Silent Night


c. 1920

There was an old man with a vast art collection.  It grew year after year with van Gogh, Picasso, Matisse, and Monet.  He loved collecting art and loved the beauty it brought into his home.   After his son became old enough to delight in his father’s work he began collecting also.  For years the two employed a vast assembly of art pieces and objects,  The pieces hung magnificently displayed in the house.  The son soon went off to college leaving the man to tend to the art himself.  As he walked by the paintings he was reminded of his son.

On the Bank of the Seine, Bennecourt (1868), a...

Shortly after he was informed that his son had died in action.  He was visited by a solider who knew his son.  The soldier presented the man with a painting he made while the two were stationed together.  The painting was far from professional but it became the man’s favorite.  He displayed it proudly and bolder that all the priceless art.  Soon after the man died. He left his collection to be auctioned off.  The auction started with the painting of his son.  All  brokers from near and far came to get a glimpse of the priceless paintings so they were shocked when the auctioneer  started with such a simple painting.  The bidding started with no gavel raised.  Finally a man in the front row raised his hand and bought the painting for $10.  When asked why, he said he knew the boy growing up.  The auctioneer closed the gavel to the astonishment of all the collectors.  In their amazement they asked what about all the other paintings?  The auctioneer said the man made it clear in his will whoever got the son’s painting got the whole collection.    No one comes to the Father except through me…….. compliments of Heritage Baptist Church..

Faith and Family


One of the most frightening things for me to do is to share my faith.  It is not necessarily hard from a worldly view so much as it is with my own children.  I have a child who lacks the social development of the children his age.  How do you explain  faith to a child who cannot look you in the eye and feel the emotional response that comes from trusting God?  How do you explain to other families in church that your son does feel loneliness.  He does not mean to be spontaneous or not respond to your emotions.  The measure of his friendships are based on  quality not the quantity. The quality of his relationships are strained daily even though everyday of his life has been a lesson in behavior or in social interventions.

I have to explain it in the easiest way I can for him.  You see he knows that Jesus died for his sins but he has a hard time grasping the beauty of that concept.  He hates the pain that Jesus suffered but, visualizing him on the cross between two criminals is the most powerful display of love he feels.  Just to know that Jesus, while on earth could forgive sin and immediately assure one of the men eternal paradise shows him what he needs spiritually.  I do not know if he feels the warmth and beauty of having God’s word to hold on to but I thank God that the bible gives us stories of unbelievable courage and love that I know he reads over and over.

Hide and Seek..God Knows


Slaves used to sing a song “Follow the drinking gourd.”  It was a code to follow the north star to the underground railroad. Frederick Douglas although an escaped slave himself, criticized the movement.  He felt it would allow slave owners to be more aware of these escape attempts therefore making it harder for the slaves to escape.Girl_20-_20Domestic_20Violence

A  Domestic violence Hooligan is aware of all these past devastating tools.  These slave owners will hold on to every ounce of your spirit.  They will recite their criticism reiteratively. Many of us  look back and feel inside our timid little hearts, descriptions from a person who has chosen to withdrawal from a family instead of giving the unconditional love the family  needed for survival. This is a devastating blow. Words can be the most camouflaged thing in a house.  They can pull a child apart and leave her empty.  The only happiness she can feel is when  words of criticism are spoken.  “Her” words make her comfortable.These are the words she is familiar with. They pull her into a dark space in her mind.  She feels powerful and rapacious there.

She will stay there.  Her misery will grow and develop in more spaces where she will save her sadness.  Look for God in your difficult places.  He will never leave you or forsake you–Hebrews 13:5.  We never have to question his words.

WWJD with These Memories


English: Jesus Christ - detail from Deesis mos...

My son just told me five years ago a teacher in his school took him aside after he had bitten a little girl in his class.  She was the child’s grandmother and she was entitled to pull my son out of his class and explain to him that if he ever bite her again she would pull out his teeth with pliers from the kitchen.  What kind of teacher could say that to a scared four-year old.  This little girl eventually became good friend with my child at school.  I do not know this lady and fortunately I just heard this story from my troubled son.

My first reaction was anger but what would Jesus do?                                                          Father forgive her he would say.                                                                                              How do I teach my child a  positive response from this?   Pray, he would say….. So we did  Does he understand?  I don’t know but now, thankfully……. it is in God’s hands.